By Cadence Alexia


J'ai mange le pain.

This happened last week.................

I was in the South of France having a weekend off from feeling like the fattest flyer in circus, sometimes you've just got to give yourself a break. My Saturday and Sunday was a guilt free wheat/gluten/sugar binge. My poor body. The week leading up to the weekend was a testing time of having little control over my diet and being surrounded by carbs and sugar.

I never miss carb heavy foods, I don't crave for bread, pasta or pizza, biscuits are a thing of the past, and potatoes are actually pretty tasteless to me now, but, when I was suddenly surrounded by wheat and gluten based EVERYTHING, with the one supermarket in town closed and a whole day of training done, I gave in and ate the bread like everyone else, I'd only been in France 6 hours.

Four things happened - 

1.My mouth had a party, French bread is amazing and the salted butter I piled on it even more so. 

2. My stomach cramped up pretty instantly, like somehow I'd forgotten to chew and the crispy bits were crisping and stabbing all up in my insdies.

3. All I wanted to do from the first bite was eat bread and butter continuously for the rest of my life! 

4. Ten minutes after the bread binge was over my head was heavy and spinny and I just wanted to curl up and sleep. 

it was the start of a downward spiral into a week of carbs, sugar, headaches and being starving the minute my eyes opened every morning.
During the week I resisted eating bread as much as I could, I stuck to veg, tuna, eggs and meat, but somehow my brain was fixated on the baguettes that sat in the centre of the table being torn up by everyone around me. Giving up and having 'one piece' was a nightly school girl error on my part, one piece ended up being the size of half a baguette and a large helping of guilt laden stomach ache, usually followed by a half hour sofa snooze.

By the weekend, when training had finished and I was visiting a friend in Montpellier, I'd given up the fight (which clearly I'd already lost) and decided for one weekend only I could eat whatever I wanted, which was pretty much every bad thing in sight, guilt free.

I saw these things on the market, but somehow, didn't get the same urge to try them..........

this guy, or a cake?? let me think..............
French cakes, pastries, baguettes, biscuits, hot chocolate, oh yeah, I even capped the whole deal with smoking marijuana at a dinner party, actually that came before the biscuits. Quelle surprise. You can rid yourself of guilt, but the head spinning insomnia was unstoppable, oh merde, never again!

Food wise I'm so glad to be home, back in a world where bread doesn't exist to me and I can cook my own delicious veg with coconut oil, avocado and good meat, coupled with a steady energy level and a willingness to partake in life after a meal!

I'm actually pretty worried about what will happen to my health if I move to France next year. I'll possibly have to throw in the towel and train to be a catcher!